Be Your Own Hero

 Hello Friends and welcome back!

Today we are going to discuss a topic that I have discussed with many people in my life. The reactions I get from sharing this story are very similar... a lot of teary eyes, a lot of "Wow's" and a lot of "Atta girls". In my last two posts I touched on needing to take a break from blogging due to life circumstance. Let's dive into that topic, grab a snack because this could take a while. 

Let's go back in time, I was well into my career, I was living in an great neighborhood, and I was in a long term "healthy" relationship. Life was good. Or so it seemed from the outside looking in. I bet for some of you reading, you picked up on the "healthy" relationship nugget of information I dropped there, didn't you? Now I do know a good bulk of my readers on a personal level, but I don't know all of you. So for those of you that lived this tale with me, you may have been there to pick me up when I couldn't do it myself and for that, I am forever grateful. You really learn who your true friends are when your world falls apart, let me tell you! To spare you the painful details, I will give you the long story short, he cheated, life as I knew it was over. Thoughts racing through my mind... "How would I recover from the scandal of cheating??", "Do I try to move on and forget it?". No, anyone what knows me, knows I am not one to let things go. It takes a LONG time (I'm talking a life time) for me to get over something. This was not something I could get over. This was something that would never go away. So the decision was made, it was over. All those years of building a life together just to go our separate ways in the end. Piece by piece the "perfect life" was given away, donated, taken to the dump. We both moved on. 

Looking back on it now, I realize at the time, I was embarrassed that my "perfect life" wasn't perfect at all. In fact, we had been growing apart for years, living separate lives in the same house, we had become room mates. The sad truth is this happens to a lot of couples. You get so comfortable or so busy with work, kids, life, that you put your partner on the back burner instead of front and center. You loose each other in the rush. Before you know it, they slip away. 

Fast forward a bit, I was navigating my new life. I thought I never wanted a relationship again. Queue: The current Mr. Adela Told Me. He came in when I least expected it and he has taught me a lot about love. He loves me on days when I am a hot mess! He taught me to trust again. He says "Relationships are give and give. Not give and take. You have to give to each other daily" and he is absolutely right. I moved to a different city, I left the job I loved so dearly, I moved away from my family and friends. I started over as the "new girl" to write a new chapter in my story.  Over the last few years, I have done a lot of soul searching. I have gone to therapy. I know a lot of people cringe when they hear that word because of the stigma attached to it. I assure you, therapy is a beautiful thing. It allows you to unpack all of the emotional baggage you carry. It is a very freeing process. Through that process I have learned a lot about myself, including the areas of improvement. I learned that no one was coming to save me. It was up to me to be my own hero and show up for myself. I needed to be happy with myself before I could be happy with anyone else.

The point in sharing this today is I want to empower you no matter where you are in life... Maybe you're in an amazing relationship (you go girl!) Maybe you're in a bad one (LEAVE HIM!) Maybe you're single (enjoy every minute of it) Whatever stage you're in, show up for yourself and be your own hero. You are in control of your life and you can create a life you love. Learn about yourself, love yourself, and most importantly, be true to yourself. Before you know it, you will be writing a new chapter in your own book of life. I hope this story gave you hope and made you feel empowered. I read a quote once that said "Wonder Woman isn't a fictional character, Wonder Woman is a mindset" and I LOVE that! Embrace your inner Wonder Woman!

I am going to wrap this up here. Please drop a comment with your thoughts on this subject, I'd love to hear from you. 

Until next time...

Xoxo,

Adela